"Then Beat Them"?
(Your Wives)
Compiled by Yusuf Estes
Compiled by Yusuf Estes
Women Treatment in Islam
We receive many questions about the treatment of
women in Islam in general and what Muslim men do with their wives in particular.
The following should help to shed some light on this most important subject.
Question:
I have a question about the treatment of the
women in Islam. Could you please tell us why the Quran tells men to
"Beat them" meaning their
wives?" [Noble Quran 4:34]
Answer:
The prophet of Allah, Muhammad, peace and
blessings be upon him, tells us Allah has said,
"Before the creation of the
universe, I forbid that I would oppress and I hate when anyone oppresses."
Let us consider a very basic understanding of the
advent of Islam and the reason for it to be revealed in the time and place where
it came. Here is a brief, yet clear statement of purpose with the coming of
Islam:
Treatment in Relationships - in Islam, it is all
about treatment; how you treat your Lord; how you treat His messenger; how you
treat yourself; how you treat your family; how you treat others; how you treat
your enviornment - it is always about treatement.
We must keep in mind the condition of the people
who were without the guidance of Almighty God and how they had strayed far away
from the message that came with Adam, Abraham, Moses and other great prophets,
peace be upon them all.
The ignorant and selfish mentality the prevailed
throughout the Arab lands did not allow women even the most basic of rights and
the treatment of women was abhorent. Women were being treated as property, even
less than the status of livestock. They were offered in trade or taken in
marriage without consent or consideration for their feelings at all. The customs
of the people at the time were far away from anything we might imagine
today.
Statements in the Quran pertaining to the
treatment of the women came to improve their condition and to raise their status
to a level of balance alongside of men. Islam came to change the hearts of the
people and show them the proper way to worship Allah and to interact with each
other.
Now let us review the proper method of providing
answers for Islam in general.
First we would say, "Thank you for asking about
Islam. It is our committment to try our best to provide answers to questions to
the best of our ability. However, sometimes we come across questions for which
we do not have answers. In this case we will refer you to others who may be able
to provide you with proper answers."
Second, we remind ourselves and the one
questioning Islam to be aware, we as Muslims, must never lie about anything,
especially our religion.
Third, we do have the original text of the Quran
and the preserved teachings of Muhammad, peace and blessings be upon him. This
enables us to verify exactly what was said, intended and taught by Muhammad,
peace and blessings be upon him, as being the religion of Islam.
Fourth, I would like to remind myself and all who
read this in the future that not all questions are purely questions. Some
contain statements and implications, that may or may not be true.
Finally, it is important to keep in mind anytime
we discover something in the answers to actually be better than what we already
have, we should be committed to change our position and accept that which is
true over that which is false and take that which is better for that which is
inferior.
After taking all of the above into consideration,
if we find that the answer to this question provides us with a better approach
to understanding what Almighty God has provided us with as a way of life on this
earth and in the Next Life, we should then make the logical decsion to begin to
worship Him on His terms.
Having said that, let us now look to the
particular verse in question in the original text (Arabic), followed by the
phonetic sounds in Latin letters and then finally, followed by a translation of
the meaning to the English language by experts in both Arabic and in Quranic
meanings.
Transliteration
Ar-rejalu qawwa muna 'alan-nisa'a bima
fadhdhallahu ba'dhahum 'ala bi'dhi wa bima anfaqu min amwalihim. Fas-saliHatu
qaintat HafaTHatul-lilghaybi bimaa HafiTHal-lahu, wal-lati takhafuna nushuza
hunna fa'iTHuu hunna wa hjuruu hunna fiil-lmadha ji'i wadhribu hunna. Fa'in
aTa'nakum flaa tabghuu 'alayhinna sabiilan. Innal-laha kaana 'aliyaan
kabiira(n).
One Explanation (tafsir) given of this
surahc (chapter 4:34) according to some scholars is:
"Men are the support of women as God gives some
more means than others, and because they spend of their wealth (to provide for
them). So women who are virtuous are obedient to God and guard the hidden as God
has guarded it. As for women who are averse in behavior, talk to them suasively,
leave them alone in bed and tap them (like a doctor would tap a patient -
lightly), if they open out to you, do not seek an excuse for blaming them.
Surely God is sublime and great."
Meaning of the Words
For the three words fa'izu,
wahjaru, and wadribu in the original,
translated here 'talk to them suasively,' 'leave them alone (in bed -
fi'l-madage'),' and tap lightly (percuss them), respectively,
Fa'izu (to use persuasive speech
or admonishment)
Fa'izu, implies the first step should be to make
clear to them using straight talk, the position they are in and what is required
to comply with the teaching of Islam. This approach may be repeated until it is
established she has understood and is willing to comply and come back into line
with the proper expected of a Muslim woman.
Hajara - Wahjaru (do not touch
or molest them)
Hajara, he says, means to separate body from
body, and points out that the expression wahjaru hunna metaphorically means to
refrain from touching or molesting them. Zamakhshari is more explicit in his
Kshshaf when he says, 'do not get inside their blankets.'
Daraba (tap lightly as
'percuss', not to beat)
Daraba lightly tap them (women).' This view is
strengthened by the Prophet's authentic hadith found in a number of authorities,
including Bukhari and Muslim:
"Could any of you beat your
wife as he would a slave, and then lie with her in the evening?"
There are other traditions in Abu Da'ud, Nasa'i,
Ibn Majah, Ahmad bin Hanbal and others, to the effect that he forbade the
beating of any woman, saying:
"Never beat God's
handmaidens."
Source:
Al-Quran: a contemporary translation by Ahmed
Ali, Princeton University Press, 1988; pp78-79
In the past, some translators of this verse have
mistakeningly used the word "beat" to represent the word
"dhaaraba" in Arabic. This is not the opinion of all scholars
and those who are well grounded in both Islam understanding and the English
language.
Men are the protectors and
maintainers of women, because Allah has made one of them to excel the other, and
because they spend from their means (to support the women). Therefore the
righteous women are devout and guard in the husband's absence what Allah orders
them to guard (e.g. their chastity, their husband's property, etc.). As to those
women on whose part you see ill?conduct, admonish them (first), (next), refuse
to share their beds, go back to them (in intimacy), if they return to obedience
and do not seek any means of annoyance against them. Certainly, Allah is Most
High, Most Great.[Noble Quran 4:34]
Other translators have offered words such as,
"tap" and "pat" to represent a physical type
of admonisment. While definitely coming closer to what might be acceptable in
many circles than such expressions as "hit" or "beat", this still does not
properly demonstrate the position and usage of such terms in relation to the
first of the verse and the connection to the following passage, wherein the
clear instructions deal with the women who do not come into compliance.
Therefore, it likely be considered to mean: "tap lightly as a doctor would
examine a patient".
We understand from this some of the translations
are not properly representing the spirit of the meaning. Therefore, they cannot
be considered to be the representation of what has been intended by Almighty
God.
Now we can properly understand that Almighty God
has commanded the men to provide for the women and allow them to keep all of
their wealth, inheritance and income without demanding anything from them for
support and maintenance. Additionally, if she should be guilty of lewd or
indecent conduct, the husband is told to first, admonish her and then she should
cease this lewdness. However, if she should continue in this indecency, then he
should no longer share the bed with her, and this would continue for a period of
time. Finally, if she would repent then he would take up sharing the bed with
her again.
Dr. Jamal Badawi (St. Mary's University, Nova
Scotia) is of the opinion these (three stages) are necessary steps prior to
divorce. Instead of a man saying, "I divorce you" three times in a row, he
should follow this procedure before acting hastily and thereby doing something
unwise and displeasing to Allah. The first step would be as mentioned above, to
give her a "good talking to" and then if she continued in such unpleasing
behavior, to leave the bed (not have intercourse with her) for a period of time
and then finally, the last straw would be to "pat" her on the arm (as you would
stroke a sheep or animal) to signify to her this is the final straw and then if
she still persisted in her bad way, he could divorce her.
Regardless of the various positions and opinions,
there is no permission established through the teachings of the Quran or the
Sunnah (way) of Muhammad, peace and blessings be upon him, wherein one person
could "beat" another person at their own discretion.
Any translations of the Quran indicating women
can be beaten or abused by men is totally out of touch with the message of Islam
from the rest of the Quran and the teachings of Muhammad, peace and blessings be
upon him.
And Allah is All Knowing of the meanings of His
ayahs (verses in Quran).
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